Once Upon a Quest Read online

  “Indubitably,” replied the washtub.

  Kira rubbed her eyes. The sides of the washtub moved fluidly around the tongue, forming a mouth from which the tub had actually spoken. The voice had a sort of metallic tone to it, like a rung bell.

  “Do you happen to know the highest peak in the Great Mountains?”

  “The highest point in the Great Mountains is currently Grimfrost, in the Blood Mountain region.”

  “Ha!” Trench folded her massive arms across her chest.

  But the goblin had a follow-up. “Do you think that’s the mountain where High Wizard Zelwynn lost his treasure?”

  “At the height of the Wizard War, in the Time of Dragons, the tallest peak was in the White Mountains. It was so high that time itself could not reach the top.”

  “More fairy tales,” scoffed the dwarf. Kira thought much the same, but Soot was undeterred.

  “Explain what you mean by ‘was,’” the goblin said.

  “The highest peak in the White Mountains was destroyed in the First Age of Faerie,” said the tub.

  “Broken Tooth,” mumbled Kira. And then louder, “I think it means the formation that’s now called Broken Tooth. That’s in the White Mountains.”

  “Then we just have to pray that Zelwynn’s treasure was not broken with it, if it was ever there at all. Thank you, tub!” Soot scooped out the tongue and slipped it back into his pouch. “Now, the smartest way to do this would be for us to split up,” he said.

  Quietly, Kira made sure her sword was still safely in its sheath. She could see what was about to happen, even if the goblin could not. Her helm was too far away, damn it all…

  “You two should go to the Blood Mountains,” Soot went on, oblivious. “Rowst and Kira and I—”

  “Will stay here,” growled the ogress. She aimed her magic crossbow at Soot, letting the point of her arrow just brush the bridge of his nose. “Tie them up,” she said to Forge.

  Forge withdrew several lengths of rope and did just that. He bound Roust’s hands and feet first, and then tied Kira and Soot together across Roust’s back.

  “You were just waiting for us to figure out where the treasure was this whole time,” said Soot.

  “How else do you think we’ve succeeded at so many quests?” The dwarf’s breath stank of the blood of whatever animal he’d feasted on that morning. “We lead by going second.”

  “Deceivers!” Soot yelled.

  “Hush,” Kira advised him.

  “You’ll never get away with this!” Soot added.

  Kira kicked his shin with the metal toe of her boot. “Unless you want your very short life to become even shorter, you will shut up,” she hissed.

  “Take the tub,” Trench growled.

  Forge fetched the tub and buckled it to his belt. “We’ll come back for you after we’ve found the treasure.” He kicked dirt into their faces. “If you’re not dead yet.”

  Kira felt Soot take a deep breath, ready to shout something else after them. Escalating the situation would only kill them quicker at this point. Instead of kicking him again, she wriggled her arm under the ropes and took Soot’s hand in hers. “Shh,” she coaxed.

  Blessedly, he calmed down and stayed silent. They watched as Trench and Forge walked away, congratulating themselves all the while. Kira waited until she was sure they were safely out of earshot to speak, but Rowst did it first.

  “They were mean,” said the troll. His enormous sigh tightened the ropes around Kira’s chest considerably. Soot winced—he wasn’t wearing armor.

  “Rowst, are you strong enough to break out of these ropes?” Kira asked.

  “Yes,” said the troll. “But my magic cap makes me think about things. And me thinks I will squish you both if I try. And Rowst don’t want to squish you because you are not mean. Me thinks you are my friends.”

  “Yes, Rowst, we are your friends,” Soot affirmed.

  “You won’t squish us,” said Kira. “Just wait until I give the word, okay?”

  “Okay,” said Rowst.

  “I have to say, I’m not entirely convinced about the squishing part,” Soot whispered.

  “I need you to shift enough so that your body is between me and Rowst. Can you do that?”

  Soot wriggled. “Maybe. I know I could if I had a little more—”

  “Rowst, I need you to blow out a big breath,” said Kira. “Like you’re blowing out a candle that’s very far away. Can you do that?”

  Rowst blew out a breath, and the bonds loosened just enough for Soot to slip himself between Kira and the troll. “What now?” he whispered, because his mouth was very close to her ear and he no doubt found it difficult to breathe.

  “Crouch into me as best as you can,” she said. “Make sure your fingers aren’t under the ropes at all. I’m going to brace my arms on either side of you, and we’ll use my armor as a shell. Got it?”

  Soot nodded. “You know, your hair is gold in the sunlight. It’s silver in the moonlight. Fascinating.”

  She could tell he was rapidly losing air. “Okay, Rowst!” Kira yelled. “Get us out of this!”

  The troll flexed his muscles and Kira pushed against the troll with all her might, trying not to crush the goblin. She could feel Soot’s flesh pressing into her armor—she just hoped whatever wounds it caused weren’t too deep.

  Finally, the strained ropes snapped and they tumbled to the ground. Kira tried to roll away from Soot, in an attempt to keep him from sustaining further damage.

  “Is you squished?” Rowst bellowed with concern.

  Soot sat up and coughed. “Only a little. Well done, Rowst!”

  The troll smiled proudly. “Rowst did well done.”

  “But now we must decide,” said Kira. “Do we go after them, or do we turn back?”

  “I really don’t have anywhere to turn back to,” said Soot.

  “Never give up!” bellowed Rowst.

  These were, of course, the answers Kira hoped for, but she did not want to sway her fellow travelers either way. Missions went much smoother when the soldiers involved chose to be there. “The next question is,” she said, “how do we catch up with them?”

  Rowst rubbed his wrists and elbows where the ropes had bitten into his leathery skin. “Rowst knows the quickest way to the White Mountains.” He tapped his orange cap. “But me thinks your legs are too short. If Rowst carries you, we go troll-speed to Broken Tooth.”

  Soot examined the remnants of Forge’s rope. “There should be enough usable pieces left to make a harness.”

  “Can you do that?” she asked.

  There was that optimistic grin again. “I can try!”

  Kira made note of the scratches along the goblin’s cheek and forearm. There was no doubt a bruise on his leg where she’d kicked him. Kira scolded herself. She was supposed to leave her enemies beaten, not her companions.

  “I’ll need to take my armor off.”

  Just saying the words made her feel uncomfortable. She was vulnerable without the magic of the armor, yes, but she was still a trained soldier. Plus, she had a troll and a goblin by her side.

  She had friends.

  Soot knew just how much her armor meant to her, but the troll, too, was surprisingly sensitive. “Rowst can carry armor in sack.” He smiled, brandishing a great many stained and cooked teeth. “Friends on back, armor in sack,” he rhymed.

  “Hey, you’re quite good at that,” Soot said as he tied a few more knots. “I don’t have the benefit of your magic cap, Rowst, but I do think this journey is going to be rather fun.”

  Kira, who had never been a fan of riding horses or other beasts of burden, didn’t have high hopes about crossing the countryside tied to the back of a running troll. But the netted sling Soot had woven for them distributed their weight evenly enough that every step the troll took wasn’t terribly jarring. Once her body got used to the rhythm Kira was able to appreciate the view that had Soot’s face fixed in wonder.

  Hills and valleys flew around them at
a breathtaking pace. They passed by forests and meadows, outpacing herds of wild boar and deer. The ground beneath them changed colors like seasons: green grass to brown sand to gray stone to red clay…at full speed, Rowst even crossed a lake from shore to shore in one jump. Soot hooted and hollered—caught up in the joy, Kira cheered right along with him. Every so often, Rowst would bellow a battle cry over his shoulder in response.

  Being able to experience such a rare and marvelous journey was one thing. Being able to share it with friends was a whole new level of magic entirely.

  They stopped to rest, eat, and sleep, but Rowst was able to keep up a fairly steady jog, day after day. Kira was highly impressed. The rocking motion of the sling eventually soothed her to the point where she could nap during the day, and then stay up until the wee hours chatting with Soot while Rowst snored the night away.

  They reached the White Mountains sometime on the fourth day. Kira woke cradled in Soot’s arms—after accidentally knocking heads a couple of times, they decided that this was the most sensible way to nap on the run.

  “Are we there?” Soot asked excitedly. He and Kira hooked their feet into the net of the sling and climbed up to peek over the troll’s shoulders. The looming mammoth before them had multiple white caps, but it was definitely not Broken Tooth.

  “This is Silvertop, isn’t it?” Kira asked, naming the giant ridge she knew to stretch along the southern border of the White Mountains.

  “Rowst took shortest way to White Mountains.” The troll pointed heavenward. “This still shortest way.”

  “Are you sure?” Soot asked. “There’s no passage around or through?”

  “I don’t know this area well enough to know of any passages through,” Kira admitted. “But I’m familiar with this type of ridge. It will definitely take less time to go over it than it will to go around.”

  “We should ask mountain,” Rowst said sagely.

  “We should do what?” asked Kira.

  “Rowst, my friend, you are a genius.” Soot pulled the tongue from the pouch at his side—good luck the conniving duo hadn’t taken that too—and held it up to the stone. “Dear Mountain, are there any passages through you that will get us to the other side quicker than scaling the top?”

  After a moment, the sheer rock face of the mountain resolved into an actual face around the tongue. “No,” said the mountain, with a deep voice of power and stone.

  “Can you make one?” asked the troll.

  “Can it what?” asked Kira.

  “Can I what?” asked the mountain.

  “Brilliant,” whispered Soot.

  “Can you please make us a passage through your face to the other side of you?” the troll asked.

  “I…er…well, I…just…” The mountain hesitated. “I suppose I could.”

  “I didn’t know mountains could do that,” Kira breathed in wonder.

  “No one’s ever asked before,” said the mountain. Its mouth stretched wider and wider, wide enough to become a cave, and then a tunnel, just large enough that Rowst could walk comfortably without having to bow his head.

  “Thank you, Great Silvertop!” Rowst bellowed.

  “Yes,” Kira added. “Thank you so very much.”

  Soot scooped up the tongue that had fallen to the ground and followed them into the dark. “Well done, Rowst!”

  In the fading daylight, Kira saw Rowst tap his wool cap. “Used magic word. Rowst did well done.”

  “What was the magic word?” Soot whispered to Kira, obviously too embarrassed to admit his ignorance.

  “‘Please.’” Kira smiled. “It really is an incredibly magic word.”

  They walked steadily down the tunnel, until the light they’d left vanished completely. Kira suddenly found her face full of troll—Rowst had come to a dead stop. Had he sensed danger? Kira suddenly wished for her armor, still safely packed in the troll’s sack. Not that it would have been much help in these blind, confining quarters.

  “What’s the matter, Rowst?” Soot asked their friend.

  “Rowst don’t like the black dark,” he said.

  “It’s strange to me, too,” said Soot. “I’ve never been in a cave before. Is this what a cave is like?”

  “This a tunnel,” said Rowst. “A tunnel of black dark.”

  “It’s also an adventure,” said Soot. “We are good at adventures. We’ve been excellent at this one so far, wouldn’t you say, Kira?”

  “Absolutely,” Kira replied. She doubted it would be helpful to list all the things she’d been wishing she’d done differently since Zelwynn had called her out of the crowd.

  “We have to work together,” said the goblin. “Just like we did back on the ridge, when we got out of the ropes. You need to be strong for us again, Rowst. Do you think you can do that?”

  Had Soot always been such an optimist? Did he never doubt? Did knowing his life was so short make him afraid of nothing? Had Goblin City been a place of happiness and harmony under his reign? If so, his subjects must truly miss him. Kira would miss him when he was gone, and she’d known the goblin less than a week.

  Stretching her hand out into the darkness, she touched Soot’s shoulder. “It’s not Rowst that has to be strong this time,” she said. “It’s me.”

  She closed her eyes and held her breath, reaching into herself for a part of her soul that had slept for so long it might not wake again. When she opened her eyes, the look on Soot’s face was priceless.

  “You’re a god,” Soot whispered reverently.

  “I’m a kobold,” she said. “Fewer and fewer of us luminesce anymore. No one is sure if the power is leaving our race entirely, or if we’ve simply forgotten how to use it. I admit, it’s been so long since I’ve done this, I wasn’t sure I’d remember myself. And I’m not that good at it.”

  “You have good glow,” said Rowst. “Good glow to fight the black dark. You is strong.”

  Kira raised her barely lit hands; her gray skin was dim as a stone firefly. There were stronger, brighter kobolds than she—Mama Kiorelys, for one—but Kira only needed to stay illuminated until they made it to the other side of the mountain. “Let’s just hope I’m strong enough to get us through this. Shall I lead the way?”

  Instead of responding, Soot smiled and gave a deep bow. Rowst did the same.

  “Thanks,” she said. “But it’s not like I’m royalty or anything. You really don’t have to do that.”

  Soot looked up at her. “When I gain the miraculous ability to glow in the dark, you can bow to me. How’s that?”

  Kira laughed. “Deal.”

  Time weighed like an invisible blanket as they crossed through the damp, dark mass of Silvertop. Kira felt like it took an age to get to the other side. She was both surprised and relieved when a light began to fill the tunnel that didn’t emanate from her.

  The cold came upon them immediately. Kira slowed her pace and adjusted her sword belt. “We must be cautious from here,” she warned her companions. “Trench and Forge may have beaten us here.”

  “They could not run troll-speed,” said the troll. His hot breath lifted his words to the heavens on great clouds of vapor.

  “Yes,” said Kira, “but they’ve quested many times. It’s possible one of them pulled a travel spell out of Zelwynn’s bag once before.”

  “Even if they did,” said Soot, “There’s no way they could have prepared an ambush. This tunnel didn’t exist until we asked the mountain to make it.”

  “Many things are possible,” said Kira. “But I did not survive this long by underestimating my enemy.”

  Soot grimaced. “I hate that we have enemies. That was not on my list of things to do when I left the city. How did this even happen?”

  Kira felt for the goblin. “You will find that there are selfish and unkind people in this world, people who were born with a darkness in their souls that will never lift. You will never be able to understand them. But I can promise you, right here and now, that I will not betray you.”


  “True friends,” Rowst said gruffly.

  Soot nodded. “Forever,” he added to the pact. “However long that might be.”

  Kira drew her sword. Soot drew his dagger. Rowst balled his fists.

  They exited the tunnel and squinted into the light. The frosted land before them was covered in oddly-shaped boulders and strange rock formations. It wasn’t hard to imagine a great mountain being stepped on by a god and shattered into rubble. Kira quickly surveyed the frozen ground, paying special attention to the sparse vegetation.

  “I don’t see tracks, but that doesn’t necessarily mean anything,” she said when she returned to her companions. “What do you suggest we do next?”

  “Maybe should ask the mountain again,” said Soot.

  Kira waved her hand over the landscape. “But how? If this really ever was a mountain, it’s been broken into a hundred thousand pieces.”

  “Broken glass, still glass,” said Rowst. “Broken man, still man. Broken heart, still heart.”

  Soot looked up at the troll. “Were you this wise before that magic cap, my friend?”

  Rowst shrugged his great shoulders. “Don’t feel wise.”

  “The wisest men usually don’t,” said Kira. “Well, let’s choose a rock and give it a try.”

  Soot wandered up and down until he found a boulder with a crevasse deep enough to wedge the tongue into. “Dear Mountain,” Soot bellowed like a troll, addressing every stone within earshot, “do you know the whereabouts of the Lost Treasure of Zelwynn?”

  “Probably,” a small voice answered. “But I don’t just hand out lost treasure for nothing. You better have brought something valuable to give me in return.”

  Kira and Soot and Rowst exchanged glances. Halfway through the last sentence, the tongue had slipped out of the crevasse and fallen to the ground. Whoever had spoken to them, it was not the mountain.

  Kira stepped closer to her companions, keeping her sword held high. “Show yourself!”

  A ginger-furred rodent appeared on top of the boulder. It was tailless and small, with pointed ears, protruding front teeth and cloudy, blind eyes. It sniffed the air and sneezed. “Troll.” It sneezed again. “Kobold.” Sneezed once more. “Goblin, eh?” It sneezed twice. “Ogre and dwarf.”